A Prayer for Hiding from my ChildrenFeb 04, 2022
Almighty God, you are Majesty, Holiness, Wondrous Presence
I am exhausted, tapped out, ragged
I am here God Almighty hiding in my bathroom
to find a single, solitary space
where no one can see me
or touch me
for 3 minutes
(maybe 5 if I’m lucky)
You say that wherever 2 or 3 are gathered, you are there.
What about where 1 is hiding, desperate to be alone?
Are you there too?
Are you here?
When you commanded Moses to remove his shoes
because he was standing on holy ground,
does that apply to this ground?
Because I haven’t cleaned this floor
and I have three boys with poor aim
and I will not remove these shoes.
I want to believe
that your Majesty, Holiness, Wondrous Presence
can even transform
into holy ground.
I turned on the fan to drown out their sounds
and to give cover for my ragged breathing
that threatens to turn into sobs.
Does your Wonder surround me
like this blanket of soothing sound?
Give me eyes to see this world as you do
starting from the inside of this bathroom.
Can your Presence work its way into my ragged places
like that deep tissue massage I fantasize about getting?
Glorious pain, easing bundles of long-crafted knots
as powerful fingers find precise places
where intention, knowledge and strength combine
to coax my body into release.
Are you here now
reaching deep into my soul,
finding those tightly held places where I cradle my pain?
With whispered Love
can you help me let go?
A scream upstairs breaks the reverie
My name echoes off the walls and sneaks under the door of my bathroom
Fan off, hand on knob,
I pause, reluctant to leave this bathroom sanctuary.
I catch sight of my eyes in the mirror, and my question is answered.
Yes, You are with me
You go with me.
Exhausted, tapped out, ragged, yes,
but alone? No.
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